Who Am I (2023)

I wrote what I would like to say my first blog post after I competed in my first big pageant back in August 2020. Then life got away from me.

I was getting into my last couple years of high school, I got a job that required a lot of hours and was just busy. So my social life took the back burner. I wouldn’t say that it is terrible because I got to do a lot of other things and made memories, but now coming to the end of High school. Graduation…. I need something to fill my time. So, I am going to start here.

Who Am I? That is what I wrote as the title, so you would think that is what this would be all about. But that is a question many people ask, and nobody knows the answer to it. At least, I don’t think anybody really has an understanding of who they really are.

So many people have two personalities in one, I think. We live in this weird age where we try so hard to make people happy on social media with posts we make or if we go out to the grocery store. You are having a bad day, but you see someone you know, so you put on a smile that says my life is good, and I am happy because you are worried about what other people think. And you never really show your true self besides when you are alone or with your family or maybe not at all.

How many people do you run into that are so happy and bright and full of joy, but have you ever taken a second look at them and thought maybe they are having a really tough time? Maybe their life is falling apart. Maybe somebody just passed away that was really close to them. Maybe they are trying just to put on a front so nobody knows what is actually going on in someone’s life, even if they look happy. They could really be happy, but I just think you never really know.

Okay, but who am I?

Am I going to talk about who I really am? Or just who I make myself out to be for social media and everyone else…

I don’t think I know who I am yet. These last three years have been stressful, crazy, life-changing, and a time I won’t understand entirely yet and maybe not ever.

However, I have made the most of it even though it has been challenging and sometimes like there is no end to the challenging times. I accomplished a lot under pressure because I knew I couldn’t stop everything. I had to push through and keep getting my stuff done.

I am still figuring out who I am and will continue to figure out who I am forever. Because I am always growing and changing and figuring out more of who I am.